Parenthood is So Damn Relentless

The name's Will.  Iron Will.

The title of today's post (the first one in nearly two years!) is my most liked Facebook post of last week.  And, perhaps one of my most liked posts of all-time.

Last week was, as they say, one of those weeks.  I frequently (and admittedly inappropriately) refer to Elise as 'the fire baby.'  More acceptable terms would be bullheaded, headstrong, intractable, mulish, obstinate, pertinacious, or strong willed.  And yes, if you're wondering, I totally have a thing for thesaurus.com.  I love the interweb!

Anyhoo.  She totally overachieved in her role as fire baby last week.  My parenting partner in crime has traveled a lot recently.  Thankfully, he was in town last week, because I'm not sure I would've survived on my own.  

Back in our Early Childhood Family Education (ECFE) days, they frequently talked about how kids (and surely adults too) have periods of equilibrium, where things roll along routinely and all is status quo; and disequilibrium, where all hell breaks loose.  It's safe to say we are in the midst of disequilibrium.  

Every. little. thing.  last week was a complete battle with this child.  Homework, eating dinner, getting ready for soccer, getting out of bed, taking a bath.  Relentless.  And, we're not off to a much better start this week.  She was a complete bear about getting out of bed.  She had homework to get done.  Time was ticking away.  Chris told her we weren't going to nudge her anymore.  If she didn't get out of bed and get ready, she would just face the consequences.  Knowing that she wouldn't be too terribly sad if she missed the bus and didn't make it to school, I had to alter this plan of attack.  I said to her, "Elise, at 8:55 you are going out to the bus stop.  I don't care if you're still in you pj's, I will take you out there and physically put you on the bus.  And you will be extremely embarrassed."  I immediately walked out.  I could hear her retorting in the background, but thanks to the background noise of the dishwasher and shower, I couldn't hear what she was saying.  Had I heard her, there's a 99.9% chance she would've set me off, so the universe (and the shower and dishwasher) was working in my favor.  Thank you, universe!

She made it to the bus.  She ate breakfast, brushed her teeth, and was dressed; but the homework was not done.  The plan was to finish it on the bus.  It will be interesting to see how that went for her.  I hope it didn't get done.  And I hope there will be a consequence at school.